A Vacation to Nowhere

The BusyBee's daycare is closed this week, so Mr. Bee and I were forced to take a few days off. We haven't had much of a break since our trip to California in April, so it's been wonderful.

Yesterday we visited Spectacle Island, one of the Boston Harbor Islands. Taking the ferry from the Long Wharf pier was easy, but the beach there was a little disappointing (very rocky). Mr. Bee enjoyed a hike and the wonderful views of Boston though.

I squeezed in a haircut this morning, which is also something I haven't done in months. It was great to do it first thing in the morning and get to enjoy how nice it looks all day today.

Then we made a giant trip to IKEA. Now that the kitchen is done, we're working on outfitting our office, and then we'll move on to BusyBee's room before tackling Jelly-Belly's (our baby boy, arriving in January, aka "Buggy") room. We're using the delivery service for the first time, which seemed particularly worthwhile given that everything will be carried into the room it needs to go in, a real blessing since I'm pretty useless these days. We always have a good time at IKEA, and today featured a special highlight: BusyBee's first completely eaten ice cream cone. :)

The amazing thing is that I still have three days off! We'll be heading to Storyland in New Hampshire for one of them, but no specific plans for the rest of the time yet. How truly wonderful to take a break from work and not feel even more structured than usual!

Getting Tired

I hate to say it, but I am getting tired.

No, I don't mean the physical exhaustion of being almost 20 weeks pregnant, though there is lots of that too.

I am getting tired of reading about the "mommy wars" and, sometimes, just parenting issues in general.

Throughout my life I've been a reader of topics close to my own experiences at the time. I devoured the Babysitters Club series as a kid, and loved the whole chick lit experience when I was just starting my own relationship and career. Since my pregnancy with BusyBee and in the years hence, I've read far too many personal accounts and fact-based articles about parenting to number. With the Internet, it's just become too easy. I realized this was a problem when I tried to mention something on a blog to Mr. Bee, and he pointed out that I read so many parenting blogs that he couldn't possibly know which one I was referring to. I was going to counter back that I read just a few, thinking of maybe three. The number is actually closer to 10.

But lately, I'm not getting as much out of it. There are still some columns I read with excitement and anticipation (I've been a fan of Catherine Newman's columns, now at Wondertime, for years), but mostly it's begun to feel like a chore. I want to be entertained and a bit informed, but I've seen so many postings on the Mattel recalls that I want to vomit. I have yet to find one website, or even one article, that I can truly agree with on matters of working moms and balancing it all. I realize that this is because no two people have the same experience anyway, but these articles are written in such a way that they are meant to be universal. For every point where I'm in agreement, there's another where I want to shout back at the screen.

I realize, too, that this blog has a lot about my life as a parent and the experiences I have. Being a mom is obviously a big part of my life, and I like the idea of documenting some of these things. I think some day it will help my children understand a little bit more about me. But when large media outlets sensationalize my favorite topics, it makes me want to curl up in a ball and get away from it all.

Feeling a Little Left Out

Lately, it seems there have been many pop culture "events" creating quite a stir. First it was the series finale of "The Sopranos." Last week it was the release of the final "Harry Potter" book, and this week it's the release of "The Simpsons" movie. Even the iPhone had a week to call its own.

Well, I don't have HBO, have little to no Harry knowledge, less than no desire to see the new movie, and can't afford the payments on the phone.

It's funny, because the BusyBee is actually marginally aware of Harry and the Simpsons, and was very good at manipulating the iPhone we played with at an Apple Store.

I consider myself pretty current on pop culture and visit many websites that regularly contain this type content. I find it a little disappointing when their content revolves around one of these frenzies that I can't get behind, and a little left out.

Though I was happy to hear about the selection of a favorite Journey song for the Sopranos finale. At least that got my attention.

Swimming and Post-School Victories

This summer, the BusyBee is taking swim lessons. I signed her up so that her best friend is in the same class, and this has been just wonderful. Not only do I get to spend half an hour talking with the girl's mother, but both girls are doing really well in the class together. I think they both have more confidence than if they had taken the class on their own, and it's adorable to see them compete and cheer each other on at the same time. Plus, the pool has a strict swim cap rule, and they look just adorable.

This past weekend I managed to fit into my own bathing suit and took the BusyBee swimming on my own. I really do like getting to play in the water with her, and she likes me being her "teacher." I hope we get to keep doing it.

The last four weeks have been very busy. First I finished my last class (and got an A, thank you very much!). The next day my parents came to Boston for a whirlwind shopping visit. After they left, I had a few nights in a row that I was out of the house, and then some visits with Mr. Bee's family this past weekend. Finally on Sunday afternoon I got a little downtime, by which I mean "time to do all the laundry." I can't remember the last time I got all of the laundry done, folded and put away by 6 o'clock on a Sunday night, so I'm chalking that up to my first "post-school" victory. But the fact that I've been able to do so much in the last two weeks is obviously a post-school victory too.

Mr. Bee keeps reminding/kidding me that I need to do my homework. Being in grad school has been part of my identity for so long, that I just feel like I've got a little break before the next class starts up. I wonder when it will really hit me that it's all over.

And now for the big announcement

I am pregnant.

Twelve-weeks, told-my-bosses, had-an-ultrasound, wearing-maternity-clothes pregnant.

Due right around the BusyBee's 4th birthday.

I am very happy about this baby. We're as ready for a 2nd child as I think we can be. But right now, I'm mostly feeling frustrated.

My biggest issue is maternity clothes and how I feel like I need more of them. I hate the thought of wearing the same few shirts over and over again. Being plus size means there aren't many options out there, particularly in tops that will be good for work purposes. I did luck out on a shopping trip a few weeks ago and bought some things, but am still feeling under prepared.

Then there's my commute. My regular train route is being altered for the summer to accommodate track work, and they are busing. This is bad enough. But today was the kick off of my "Give me your seat, I'm pregnant!" MBTA campaign. So far it's People Who Pretend Not to Notice - 1, pregnant me - 0. I had to stand on both the train and bus portions of my schlep home. This is not fun.

I want a new purse too.

Am I feeling a bit emotional, slightly irrational? You bet. It's going to be a long six more months.

PS: The BusyBee is very excited about the baby. She has lots of logistical questions about taking the baby to stores, school, etc. She also thinks it's hysterical that the baby "eats" my food and "drinks" my water. She can't wait to be a big sister, and I am happy for her.

"You're welcome."

I don't know why, but I have the hardest time uttering those three syllables. Whenever I accomplish a task for someone, especially a boss, I reply with "It was no problem at all, really." I guess I don't want them to think there's anything I can't handle. But the truth of the matter is that some of these tasks are rather difficult/time-consuming/boring. I should be able to accept their gratitude with a simple "you're welcome" instead of insinuating "sure, feel free to give me all the junk you don't feel like doing, I'll take it on no matter what." I don't even know how I developed this pattern, but lately, I've been very conscious that I'm saying it, and yet I can't seem to stop. I've never been very good at accepting compliments either.

In other news, this stuff about the computers crashing on the space station is rather scary. It's not getting much press what with all the Paris Hilton prison musings and all, but I really wish people cared more about these things. I feel for NASA and the Russian space program, partly because I have studied some of their bigger disasters in business school (which might explain why I am more aware of this issue than some). The idea of solving this problem is so daunting to me: the experts aren't there with them on the station, and they have such limited ability to fix things from a distance. Indeed, they have no real way of knowing just what it causing the error with so much technology involved. Who knows what tiny aspect is throwing everything off?

I guess if they can successfully pull it off and the station does not need to be evacuated, we all owe them gratitude. Hopefully they'll know how to say, "you're welcome."

Different MBA Perspectives

After a three-plus year break, I am currently taking an actual Finance course. I have tried to take more of the courses relating to organizational behavior and strategy, and I think this has given me a good understanding of how companies work.

In the Finance courses, learning is much more narrow in scope. I am taking a course on fixed income investments, and, to be frank, it's kicking my ass. I'm having to invest a lot of time for what I consider to be very little return. Somehow, I guess I forgot to do the present value calculation on this course before enrolling.

(Actually - I didn't have many options. Seeing as this is my very last class in the program, I've taken almost everything. And summer offerings are always slim.)

I could have done a concentration in Finance, and I think I would then understand a lot about how to finance company operations. But would I have such a universal view? Would I know how to motivate the people behind the spreadsheets and debt offerings? Would I understand the operations and marketing pressures? I'm not sure that I would. Hopefully, someday I'll have an opportunity to use this broader knowledge base.

We'll soon be heading to a Village Day celebration in our town, with some of our neighbors. Their five-year-old son is so good to the BusyBee, incredibly patient with her. He doesn't seem to notice that she's three, and can't quite keep up with him. He'll be a big brother in the coming weeks, and his dad says it's good big brother training. The BusyBee won't need any big sister training - she's raring to go.